Here i was holding a glass of water for her..and she wasn\’t even there. Why? because she was FAKING IT! but what about my concern?? I didn\’t fake it!
My head hurt so much and then Lavanya came in..asking me if I was okay…
Thinking of Khushi as usual, I shouted at LAvanya..called her khushi too..
Thankfully, she just walked away..
My head was hurting me so bad.
I opened the door and…there she was. NOW, she won\’t escape me!
HA- coz no one is at home- except for me.
As she\’ll soon find out…
She was trapped…within my arms..these, her world for now. MY world! Now she\’ll bear the brunt of what she\’d unleashed!
So close..but it didn\’t matter right now.
I was barely holding on to control as I spelt it out to her- she needed to do her job. She needed to simply do that. NOT ignore me or infuriate me!
This time..I won\’t be affected!
I took a sadist delight in telling her there was no one at home.
Who did she think she was? unbearable was her thought to me- though they plagued me! but never mind, she needed to do her job. Keep it to that and stop messing with my head!
“shaadi ka idea humara banaya hua nahi hai”
She told me about marriage. A marriage- a union of two lives forever. A complete life. But I won\’t get it- as i was \’matlabi\’. She called me a man whose “character” was “dheela”
I couldn\’t let her go. Character dheela. I\’ll show her what that means.
I held on to her arm, twisting it behind her back as i pulled her closer. i held her firmly.
And then, she started crying.. and said that wasn\’t what she meant? and I pulled her closer..I could see into the depths of those tearful eyes..I was hurting her.. her silent eyes reproached me…guileless..
and i left her.
Then Lavanya came in. I left.
I thought of what I had done..hurt her… my hands would leave marks on her skin…but I wasn\’t wrong in what I had said..I didn\’t think.
I was working, thinking, trying to work and function properly when the lights went off!
So I went to ask di what was up and was told it was khushi..so I went, wondering why all wrong things were always connected to her?
I found them..LA said it was her fault..taking her side.. Khushi came down..didn\’t utter a word.. and with the candlelight on her face..as she lit the candle..i was…lost…
I think she could sense me looking so I looked away with difficulty… i looked at her..this time, didn\’t look away.. and the candle tipped closer to her arm..
Before it could hurt her, I tilted it back..
then i noticed, Lavanya had also fallen..so I went to her, helped her up and restraining myself from looking at khushi..took lavanya inside…leaving the light with her..
Inside..at the table.. I saw..things..the preparations for..barsi..
and i walked away..into my room.
After that, it was impossible to stop my thoughts from going back to that fateful night..that hateful nightmare I couldn\’t come out from.
Di had given me everything…and as I was thinking, di came.. and i just hugged her..held on to the one loving element in my life..the one person who was like ma…her eyes were filled with love and compassion…I had to control myself from sobbing..but i did control..and I said I\’m fine… but…for today..I won\’t be…for today..I\’ll remember the love I lost..that made me who I am..and that could never be brought back…
That\’s it guys!
I know I didn\’t do justice to it!
but let\’s just appreciate the awesomeness of acting today!
the wonderful execution and- this is what hate-love will be like..any complaints?
Arnav made me cry..so did khushi..coz that grip must have held..such a strong vice-like grip
and ohh B looked so so amazing..his strong forearms..his hands..his eyes..hayeee his voice..oh GOD..his concern..his emotion..
was hurt today.. I wasn\’t angry..I was hurt..and not just physically…he has always been leaving marks on me..this one will be hard for me to forget.
That man still refused to become a monster in action- he held me, threatened me, but left me too..what was I to think of all of this?
He hurt me, and still he saved me from any kind of hurt?
It reminded me of him..it always will..if i would ever be able to forget…
love to all